Thursday, December 21, 2006

A LETTER WRITTEN BY A JUNKIE TO ZAVEN

(THE FAMOUS TALK SHOW 'SIRI WIN FATAHETT')
Dear Zaven,
I am a crack dealer in Basta who has recently been diagnosed as carrier of the HIV virus. My parents live in the suburb of Beirut (al-Dahiyeh) and one of my sisters, who live in Jounieh, is married to a transvestite. My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling marijuana in their small garden and are currently dependent on my other two sisters who are prostitutes in Maameltein.I have two brothers. One is currently serving a non-parole life sentence at Roumieh for murder of a teenage boy in 1994. The other brother is currently being held in the Trablos Jail on charges of neglecting his three children. I have recently become engaged to marry a former Thai prostitute who lives in Jiyeh and, indeed, is still a part-time "working girl" in a brothel.
My problem is this: I love my fiancée and look forward to bringing her into the family and of course I want to be totally honest with her.
Should I tell her about my uncle who voted for Michel Aoun?

Signed,
Worried About My Reputation

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