Wednesday, January 16, 2013

مشال عون، جبران بسيل، فادي عبود ... كلوا خرا


أفضلتَ علينا يا معالي وزيرالسياحة فادي عبود. شكراً لك على تصريحاتك المدروسة بعمق. إنها فعلا مؤامرة على سياحتك الموصوفة والفريدة من نوعها عالمياً. فما أن سمعنا، نحن اللبنانيين المقيمين في الإمارات العربية تصريحك بأن "الإمارات تآمرت على السياحة اللبنانية بنية كسب السياح"، حتى بدأنا بتوضيب ثيابنا الشتوية والصيفية، وتركنا منازلنا في الإمارات وقررنا اللحاق بك حتى بتنا "نتفركش" ببعضنا بعضاً

لكن بعض الخارجين على القانون على طرق المطارات في دبي، (فكما تعلم في دبي 3 مطارات والرابع بات جاهزا) عرقلوا سيرنا بعد أن أضرموا النار بدواليب السيارات. كما أن مجموعة مشاغبين أجبرتنا على حمل حقائبنا مسافة طويلة، وتعرضنا للخطف من قبل أفراد عشيرة خارجين على القانون ينعتون هنا "بالمقاديدة" ففاتتنا الرحلة المتوجهة إلى بيروت. وللأسف ما زلنا هنا نعمل ونكسب رزقنا بعرق جبيننا ونحقق نجاحاتنا من دون واسطة ولا طائفة

معالي الوزير،
أنا في العادة أنتقد الفنانين على بياض هذه الصفحة، وعادة ما أترك أفكاري بخصوص الوطن تنخر عظامي وحدي وأنا أرقب فشلكم العظيم في بناء جسور المودة والمحبة وإعادة اللحمة إلى ذاك الوطن الذي أحببناه جميعا، وحملناه معنا أينما ذهبنا. لا بل تحولنا إلى سفراء له ننشر حكاياه الجميلة ونغرق في الحديث عن طبيعته وصفاء سمائه

فاسمح لي معاليك بأن أخبرك أشياء قد تكون عرفتها، لكن لعل في الإعادة إفادة. لقد تخطانا العالم يا معالي الوزير، وسئم من أخبارنا ومن ثرثرتنا حتى بتنا "مسخرة" أمام خلق الله بسببكم يا حكام الوطن الصغير. هل تعلم كم كان عدد السياح في دبي ليلة رأس السنة؟ لقد تخطى المليون سائح ولم تحصل ضربة كف ولم يضرم أحد النار بدولاب، ولم يقفل أحد طريق المطار، وكانت كل الطرقات سالكة، والكهرباء مشعشعة كالعادة

كان الطقس بديعاً والناس من جميع أصقاع الأرض يستمتعون بعزف الأوركسترا السمفونية قرب برج خليفة، ويراقبون رقص النافورة الأجمل في العالم. وما إن اكتمل الزمن وأعلن العام نهايته، انطلقت ضحكات الأطفال ولمعت عدسات الكاميرات من كل صوب لتسجل تلك اللحظات السعيدة في سماء زيّنتها الألعاب النارية لا الرصاص الخطاط الذي ينطلق بعد كل خطاب لأي من زعماء الحروب الصغيرة

عن أية سياحة تتحدث معاليك؟ عن أمن مطار بيروت؟ أو عن التشبيح داخل حرمه؟ عن سيارات التاكسي التي تنتظر السائحين ليقوم سائقوها بتشليحهم وشتمهم في حال رفضوا الامتثال لرغباتهم؟ عن طريق المطار الآمنة؟ عن أسعار المطاعم المتحركة حسب لون بشرة الزبون أو زيه الوطني؟ عن أي شيء تتحدّث؟ عن نشرات الأخبار التي يتحفنا بها الإعلام اللبناني كل مساء محمَّلة بملوثات الوطن؟ أو عن المشعوذين الذين باتوا يتوقعون للدول مستقبلها وكأن من يعيش في ذلك البلد صدّق الكذبة واعتبر نفسه محور الكرة الأرضية

ألا ترى معي أننا بحاجة لعدم تدخلكم في حياتنا نحن المهاجرين بل المهجّرين قسرا بسببكم؟ دعونا نعمل بعيداً عن خلافاتكم وسنمحي شهر آذار من روزنامة حياتنا. ذلك الشهر الذي سرقتم أعداده وبات كالشيطان لأي لبناني حريص على مستقبله. لقد عرّيتم أنفسكم وعريّكم بات عارا علينا. نحاول أن نخبّئ هذا العار كل يوم لكن الرائحة الكريهة تنبعث منه وتقتلنا. من أنتم؟ ماذا تريدون؟ أنتم منقسمون دائما ومفلسون وغير قادرين على تحسين شروط العيش لمواطنيكم. أين الكهرباء؟ هل وصلت بواخركم الموعودة؟ هل وجدتم حلاً للتخفيف من زحمة المرور؟ هل أعدتم مخطوفي (ضيوف) أعزاز؟ ماذا فعلتم؟

آخر ما نتج عن أفكاركم السوداء هو أن النازحين السوريين هم سبب كل مشاكل لبنان، وتعملون الآن وبكل موضوعية على إعادتهم إلى سوريا لتتم تصفيتهم وتريحوا العالم منهم فيحصل اللبنانيون على الزيادة المضافة إلى رواتبهم وتفتح الطرقات وترفع الجسور وتعلن حالة من الفرح مع خروج آخر نازح ويتم تسليمه لضباط المخابرات السورية

أليس من الأفضل أن تصمت وتنقل صمتك إلى الآخرين وأن تعيد النظر في قرار منع التدخين لأن الإلتزام به بات أضحوكة للمساكين؟ أليس من المفيد أن تترك الشعب اللبناني يتدبر أمره كما كان على طول الأزمان من دون حكومة ليتعثر هنا وينهض هناك.. والله، كما جرت العادة، "بيدبّرها"؟

Monday, December 31, 2012

A short & touching story



     One day a twenty five years old girl was going back to her house in Dahieh, to find a suspicious young man sitting in his car in front of the entrance watching her. First she was afraid but after seeing him there day after day she became used to it, and the guy was a gentleman, he was so respectful that his head was always down; he even never looked up while she passes. Although it was irritating; but in fact, the young girl started to like the idea of someone that dedicated, sitting there day in day out just to take a glimpse at her.
After sometime the girl started falling in love especially that she was in her marriage age. So she started wondering why he never tries to come to her house and ask her father to marry her if he is that in love. She thought, maybe it is because of the financial difference since his car was so old, and her house was so luxurious, or is he still not sure of his feeling, but he stays there long hours even after she goes inside the house and sometimes she sleeps and he is still there.
Until one day and after more than two months on this, she gathered all her powers and went towards his car, her heart was beating like crazy; he wasn’t that good looking from near but never the less she bent down and asked him “why are you always in front of my house sir?” He looked at her with his eyes wide open and full of happiness, excitement and wonders and said “the Wi.Fi. connection at your place is so fuck’n fast woman!!”

Sunday, December 30, 2012

TWITTER TRICK


I never believed this shit could be for real, until I tried this one.
I still can’t figure out how they did it.

AMAZING TWITTER TRICK

Step 1: Think of something you would really like to happen in your life. Write it below as a comment under anonymous, if you're not on the blog Go to http://capisho.blogspot.com/2012/12/twitter-trick.html

Step 2: Follow this account on Twitter http://twitter.com/Capisho after exactly 24hrs you will receive the exact time & date.

*If you have a Gmail account, click on "Join this site" in blue box below to the left; so you can stay informed in case this date changes or seize to exist for any specific reason. 

*You will never receive anything if what you asked for happened during this 24hrs frame.

Thursday, October 25, 2012

Muslims vs Jews



UNBELIEVABLE AND WRITTEN BY A MUSLIM
It sure makes interesting reading... particularly coming from a Pakistani official.  By: Dr Farrukh Saleem
The writer is the Pakistani Executive Director of the Center for Research and Security Studies, a think tank established in 2007, and an Islamabad-based freelance columnist.
Why are Jews so powerful?

There are only 14 million Jews in the world; seven million in the Americas, five million in Asia, two million in Europe &
100,000 in Africa. For every single Jew in the world there are 100 Muslims.

Yet, Jews are more than a hundred times more powerful than all the Muslims put together.
Ever wondered why?
Jesus of Nazareth was Jewish.
Albert Einstein, the most influential scientist of all time &
TIME magazine's 'Person of the Century', was a Jew.

Sigmund Freud, the father of psychoanalysis was a Jew.
So were Karl Marx, Paul Samuelson and Milton Friedman.

Here are a few other Jews whose intellectual output
has enriched the whole humanity:

Benjamin Rubin gave humanity the
vaccinating needle. Jonas Salk developed the first polio vaccine. Albert Sabin developed the improved live polio vaccine. Gertrude Elion gave us a leukemia fighting drug. Baruch Blumberg developed the vaccination for Hepatitis B. Paul Ehrlich discovered a treatment for syphilis. Elie Metchnikoff won a Nobel Prize in infectious diseases. Bernard Katz won a Nobel Prize in neuromuscular transmission. Andrew Schally won a Nobel in endocrinology. Aaron Beck founded Cognitive Therapy. Gregory Pincus developed the first oral contraceptive pill. George Wald won a Nobel for our understanding of the human eye. Stanley Cohen won a Nobel in embryology. Willem Kolff came up with the kidney dialysis machine.

Over the past 105 years, 14 million Jews have won 15-dozen Nobel Prizes while only three Nobel Prizes have been won by 1.4 billion Muslims (other than Peace Prizes).
Why are Jews so powerful?
Stanley Mezor invented the first micro-processing chip. Leo Szilard developed the first nuclear chain reactor; Peter Schultz, optical fibre cable; Charles Adler, traffic lights; Benno Strauss, Stainless steel; Isador Kisee, sound movies; Emile Berliner, telephone microphone; Charles Ginsburg, videotape recorder.

Famous financiers in the business world who belong to Jewish faith include
Ralph Lauren (Polo), Levis Strauss (Levi's Jeans), Howard Schultz (Starbuck's), Sergey Brin (Google), Michael Dell (Dell Computers), Larry Ellison (Oracle), Donna Karan (DKNY), Irv Robbins (Baskins & Robbins) and Bill Rosenberg (Dunkin Donuts).

Richard Levin, President of Yale University, is a Jew. So are Henry Kissinger (American secretary of state), Alan Greenspan (Fed chairman under Reagan, Bush, Clinton and Bush), Joseph Lieberman (US Senator), Madeleine Albright (American secretary of state), Casper Weinberger (American secretary of defense), Maxim Litvinov ( USSR foreign Minister), David Marshal (Singapore’s first chief minister), Issac Isaacs (governor-general of Australia ), Benjamin Disraeli (British statesman and author), Yevgeny Primakov (Russian PM), Barry Goldwater (US Senator), Jorge Sampaio (president of Portugal ), John Deutsch (CIA director), Herb Gray (Canadian deputy PM), Pierre Mendes (French PM), Michael Howard (British home secretary), Bruno Kreisky (chancellor of Austria ) and Robert Rubin (American secretary of treasury).

In the media, famous Jews include Wolf Blitzer (CNN), Barbara Walters (ABC News), Eugene Meyer (Washington Post), Henry Grunwald (editor-in-chief Time), Katherine Graham (publisher of The Washington Post), Joseph Lelyveld (Executive editor, The New York Times), and Max Frankel (New York Times).

The most beneficent philanthropist in the history of the world is George Soros, a Jew, who has so far donated a colossal $4 billion most of which has gone as aid to scientists and universities around the world.

Second to George Soros is Walter Annenberg, another Jew, who has built a hundred libraries by donating an estimated $2 billion.

At the Olympics, Mark Spitz set a record of sorts by winning 7 gold medals; Lenny Krayzelburg is a three-time
Olympic gold medalist. Spitz, Krayzelburg & Boris Becker (Tennis) are all Jewish.

Did you know that Harrison Ford, George Burns, Tony Curtis, Charles Bronson, Sandra Bullock, Billy Crystal, Woody Allen, Paul Newman, Peter Sellers,
Dustin Hoffman, Michael Douglas, Ben Kingsley,
Kirk Douglas, Goldie Hawn, Cary Grant, William Shatner, Jerry Lewis and  Peter Falk are all Jewish?

As a matter of fact, Hollywood itself was founded by a Jew. Among directors and producers, Steven Spielberg, Mel Brooks, Oliver Stone, Aaron Spelling ( Beverly Hills 90210), Neil Simon (The Odd Couple), Andrew Vaina (Rambo 1/2/3), Michael Man (Starsky andHutch), Milos Forman (One flew over the Cuckoo's Nest), Douglas Fairbanks (The Thief of Baghdad ) and Ivan Reitman (Ghostbusters) are all Jewish.


So, why are Jews so powerful?

Answer :
 EDUCATION
Why are Muslims so powerless? 

There are an estimated 1,476,233,470 Muslims on the face of the planet: one billion in Asia, 400 million in Africa,
44 million in Europe and six million in the Americas. Every fifth human being is a Muslim; for every single Hindu there are two Muslims, for every Buddhist there are two Muslims & for every Jew there are one hundred Muslims.

Ever wondered why Muslims are so powerless?
Here is why:
There are 57 member-countries of the Organization of Islamic Conference (OIC), and all of them put together have around 500 universities; i.e. one university for every three million Muslims. The United States has 5,758 universities & India has 8,407.

In 2004, Shanghai Jiao Tong University compiled an 'Academic Ranking of World Universities', and intriguingly, not one university from Muslim-majority states was in the top-500.

As per data collected by the UNDP, literacy in the Christian world stands at nearly 90 per cent and
15 Christian-majority states have a literacy rate of 100 per cent.

A Muslim-majority state, as a sharp contrast, has an average literacy rate of around 40 per cent and there is no Muslim-majority state with
a literacy rate of 100 per cent.

Some 98 per cent of the 'literates' in the Christian world had completed primary school, while less than 50 per cent of the 'literates' in the Muslim world did the same.

Around 40 per cent of the 'literates' in the Christian world attended university
while no more than two per cent of the 'literates' in the Muslim world did the same


Muslim-majority countries have 230 scientists per one million Muslims.
The US has 4,000 scientists per million & Japan has 5,000 per million.

In the entire Arab world, the total number of full-time researchers is 35,000 &
there are only 50 technicians per one million Arabs. (In the Christian world there are up to 1,000 technicians per one million).

Furthermore, The Muslim world spends 0.2 per cent of its GDP on research and development, While the Christian world spends around five per cent of its GDP.

Conclusion:
The Muslim world lacks the capacity to produce knowledge!

Daily newspapers per 1,000 people and number of book titles per million are two indicators of whether knowledge is being diffused in a society.

In Pakistan, there are 23 daily newspapers per 1,000 Pakistanis while the same ratio in Singapore is 360. In the UK, the number of book
titles per million stands at 2,000 while the same in Egypt is 20.

Conclusion: The Muslim world is failing to diffuse knowledge.
  

Exports of high technology products as a percentage of total exports are an important indicator of knowledge application. Pakistan’s export of high technology products as a percentage of total exports stands at one per cent. The same for Saudi Arabia is 0.3 per cent; Kuwait, Morocco, and Algeria are all at 0.3 per cent, while Singapore is at 58 per cent.

Conclusion: The Muslim world is failing to apply knowledge.
   

Why are Muslims powerless?

.....Because we aren't producing knowledge,
.....Because we aren't diffusing knowledge.,
.....Because we aren't applying knowledge.

And,
the future belongs to knowledge-based societies.

Interestingly, the combined annual GDP of 57 OIC-countries is under $2 trillion.
America, just by herself, produces goods and services worth $12 trillion; China $8 trillion, Japan $3.8 trillion and Germany $2.4 trillion (purchasing power parity basis).

Oil rich Saudi Arabia, UAE, Kuwait and Qatar collectively produce goods and services (mostly oil) worth $500 billion;
Spain alone produces goods and services worth over $1 trillion, Catholic Poland $489 billion and Buddhist Thailand $545 billion.

(Muslim GDP as a percentage of worlds GDP is fast declining).
So, why are Muslims so powerless?
Answer:
Lack of education & very narrow mindedness.  

All we do is shouting to Allah the whole day!!! And
blame everyone else for our multiple failures!!!!!